2021: A Look Back

Frankly, I’m hungover.

I’m facing the consequences not of a particularly wild night out or even a crazy night in. Rather, I’m experiencing the mental and emotional anguish of powering through the most sensational Korean drama I have seen in recent memory. (It’s called The Red Sleeve and if you have even one iota of interest in K-dramas… go watch it. Now.)

I’m also generally hungover from the year 2021 and all the feelings she served us. Far from a terrible year for me, it was still… well, you know those nights that end where you least expected it to? The kind that leads to mornings gathered around the kitchen island with your roommates re-hashing every detail over pounding headaches and Liquid IVs?

That’s the kind of year I had. And here’s what I never want to forget about it:

Cocoon of Chaos

What was originally meant to be a two month return to my childhood home for the holidays turned into “let’s just get through the winter.” This turned into “stay until you can get the vaccine!” (In March 2021, when vaccine waitlists were longer than that of any NYC restaurant opening ever, well, let’s just say that Texas was a good place to be.) Then it was waiting for the “return to office” and then with wanting to stay put for birthdays, holidays, (canceled) vacations, well…

Here we are a year later, still in Houston!

It’s been a year of hearing tiny feet racing into my room before dawn, and chubby cheeked-grins greeting me at breakfast. I’ve been here for every beautiful milestone as Lulu grew from a babbling toddler to a full-blown mini-person with so many opinions! This winter we huddled together under blankets and over hotpot when we lost power and service for a handful of days; and this summer I cursed the unforgiving humidity until I caught whiffs of the kids slathered in sunscreen-and-strawberry-juice.

The sweetest bedtime routines, the morning dance parties to Meeks’s dinosaur playlist. The weekends we would indulge in Chick-Fil-A breakfasts and steaming bowls of pho and boxes on boxes on boxes of cookie-brownies from Domino’s.

I never could’ve imagined that I would spend so much of my mid-twenties in the very town I tried so hard to leave, sleeping on the same creaky twin-sized bed that I did when I was eight years old. And trust me – there were plenty of moments I was pissed the hell off walking around the neighborhood full of cookie-cutter houses boasting outrageous election signage. Screw the pandemic and the exhausting, draining, terrifying ride it’s forced us all on; but all in all, I’m so grateful to have had this intermission to soak in these moments with my family.

Revisiting My Roots

For the first time ever in my adult life, I didn’t travel to anywhere new this year.

Even in 2020, I managed to catch some time in Colombia before the madness began.

But that’s not to say I didn’t travel at all in 2021! In fact, I unintentionally embarked on a bit of a Hometown Tour in the fall, revisiting all of the places that I’ve called home.

In September, I spent a weekend in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, visiting my friend Leah. I was born in Chapel Hill and moved away when I was 10; this was my first time back in close to a decade. There were strokes of familiarity – a street to my elementary school, a shopping center I’d frequent with my mom. We even drove by my childhood house. But it was also all so foreign to me. Even the street that I grew up on – it was so much hillier and narrow than I remembered! I loved exploring this town anew, and then calling my parents afterward to reminisce with them.

Then, in October, I was back in San Francisco to see my friends, and also for my 5 year college reunion at Stanford. The two other places I’ve called home. This was all the more nostalgic because it marked 10 years since I met most of my best friends, and one year since I moved away. For the most part, this was the kind of visit all about ordering take-out from our go-to spots, taking a hot yoga class from my old studio, and ensuring not a night went by without sharing every life update over a bottle of wine.

And of course, we’ve talked enough about Friendswood, but I’ll just say that aside from everything I’ve mentioned, it’s also been lovely to discover new-to-me treats here too: a sprawling park 5 minutes away that I’ve never been to, a charming cupcake shop downtown, a contender for the best Boudin kolache ever.

Though I’m now itching to go somewhere new, visiting these places and people that have shaped me was perhaps the most meaningful way of all to step back into accruing frequent flier miles.

New York, New York

The Hometown Tour 2021 was supposed to build up to an official move to New York by the end of the year. New year, new hometown and all that. Well, I missed that poetic deadline but not for lack of trying.

In September, I arrived in New York for a work trip and extended it to test out some neighborhoods I’m interested in moving to. I was at a hotel in Downtown Brooklyn which was overstimulating to my now-suburban senses to say the least, and then stayed in a couple of different Airbnbs in Williamsburg, and loved it. I also called Greenwich Village home for a week – um, dreamy – and Boerum Hill, too.

I thought I’d get lonely, but it was so fun to pretend I was already living there. Commuting to work, grocery-shopping at bougie Brooklyn markets, grabbing drinks with co-workers after work again. I even went on a date! I thought the days I’d love the most were the ones where I booked myself for All! The! Things! But what has stuck to me the most has been a rainy Sunday where I braved the weather to grab donuts and coffee and let myself binge Netflix in bed all day. Or when I’d force myself to go outside after staring at a screen all day to see Brooklyn in all of its beautiful fall colors. I think they might’ve been glimpses of home in a new place.

I alternated time in New York with my visits to Chapel Hill, San Francisco, Boston to see the babies, and Houston. Each New York visit after the first one coincided with some of my best friends and family visiting, which meant that I had a ball of a time there before Omicron struck. Now, let’s hope 2022 is the year I officially call it home.

A Year of Good Habits

So yes, it’s been a year of family and friends and visiting beloved places.

But there’s one other important theme to call out that’s solely for me. Away from the temptations of San Francisco’s truly exceptional food & drink scene, and away from a hectic life of friends and work and dating and all of that, there was little for me to focus on other than family and me.

As a result, I read over 60 books. I got interested in personal finance, and implementing systems to have mine make sense. I kept up a 600+ day Duolingo streak for Spanish.

I also lost 20 pounds by strictly intermittent fasting, documenting every single thing I ate, and working out regularly for the first time ever. I did Melissa Wood Health’s daily flows and doubled-up with a fun Obe class or Kayla Itsines’s Low Impact HIIT program (finished the whole dang thing!) every other day. I felt lighter, stronger, healthier, and was surprised (??) to have more energy and less back pain.

I lost the momentum with the workouts and healthy eating during one of my New York trips, but having proved to myself once that I can do it and I liked doing it – I’m not overthinking it. All in all, there was a lot of personal growth and acceptance for myself this year, which is something I definitely want to remember about this year.

A Few (More) Favorites

This has officially reached the number count of a novel, so I’ll stop after this. But I did want to call out:

Harry Styles. Yep, I fell hard and fast for this man in the year 2021 lest I ever forget.

I don’t think I turned on the stove even once since my mom has a monopoly on cooking in her kitchen, but I did bake a few times and these blueberry muffins were GLORIOUS. Definitely won’t be needing another blueberry muffin recipe in this lifetime. Also, these frozen chocolate croissants from Williams-Sonoma will forever be my back pocket special occasion treat.

My dining out adventures were all grouped into my Q4 Re-Emergence into Society, but dangit there were quite a few memorable gustatory delights still. Lazy Bear with two of my best friends more than lived up to all the hype; the coal-roasted A5 Wagyu paired with a glass of Anthem’s 2011 Cabernet Sauvignon was likely the single best bite of food I’ve ever had.

New-to-me finds in New York… there were many, but the espresso martini and vibes at Caffe Dante were as exquisite as everyone says. The scallop risotto at Dr. Clark, delectable. Best Bagel, my go-to bagel place for in-office days indeed offers up … the best bagels. And I spent more money on beverages of all kinds this fall than on anything else, but the Spanish Latte from % Arabica was the most *chefs kiss* of them all.

What else, what else. Books? The ones that ranked 5 stars in my book: Anthony Bourdain’s Medium Raw; Girl, Woman, Other; In Five Years (wrecked! me!); Anxious People; Unorthodox; This Is How It Always Is (wow); Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo; Beautiful Ruins. There are also a couple of books that helped me understand myself better, or impacted my behavior in some way: I Will Teach You to Be Rich, Quiet: The Power of Introverts, and Ghosts.

Things I’ve watched and loved: a looooooot of TikTok. I didn’t track my Netflix binges, but Hometown Cha Cha was a delightful K-drama that made me smile. I watched a lot of Marvel with my sister on weekends, and Ted Lasso too. During a heavy year, I clearly looked for light, feel-good shows!

✨ ✨ ✨

Obviously, I’ve neglected this space. I chuckled when I logged on to see that my last post was a recap of 2020. And boy this is a clunky, chatty re-emergence, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned from documenting my early twenties over at Perpetually Caroline and then decidedly not documenting my mid-twenties, it’s that I’ve missed this.

I’ve missed the open space I can come to reflect and express and process. I’ve missed recapping travels and sharing recommendations and typing out long, rambling sentences that hardly make sense. I’ve missed coming back months later to read those same rambling sentences only to nod and think, oh yes I remember feeling that way.

So. Thanks for humoring me and my thoughts and all that jazz.

Hope to see you here again – maybe not a whole year later this time?